7 [JUST BEFORE]

The aging lectern creaked as I leaned hard against it.

Listening to yourself saying hard things in front of students is like being in a movie while watching a movie and making a movie at the same time. Problem is, the script is nowhere to be found, and a surreal moment of self-assured panic constantly explodes in your head.

This is clearly the end of the semester, and the end of the lecture, and… my last lecture in this, or any University. Forever and ever, amen. If looks could kill, I’d be sizzling hamburger by now… the scowls of the Dean sitting in the back row making this all the more excruciating, especially after his bluntly terminating my faculty status yesterday, effective right now, at the end of this final lecture…

I might as well drive the nail in the coffin… final lecture! The data, it’s all true… eat this, Doc-tor Broad-man, you criminal!

“As my published… and peer reviewed… work shows, much has happened in the last century that should give humanity a reason to pause, and ask ourselves some species-wide questions.”

“In conclusion, the data clearly suggests that, regardless of technologic innovation and advancement, the past century has seen sharp increases in overall global human suffering with a corresponding decline in human quality of life. Thank you.”

Final power-point frame, the exhaustive references on the right screen, the banner title ‘Better Off?’ glowing on the left… Provocative title… and my name: Craig Thomas, PhD, Associate Professor, Department of Socio-Anthropology and Culture, Southern Michigan University.

Last time anyone will see all those words together…

The sporatic and muted applause grated like a recycling bin being emptied inside this small, ancient University lecture hall. Hard to tell… everyone’s just glad it’s over?

Glance at the watch. Oh, hell. Ten minutes left. OK, I’m a seasoned academic, don’t give in to the darkness quite yet. Say something… your last free-style swim, anyway…

“Heavy stuff for the last lecture of this semester. I’m looking forward to some enlightened disagreement on the e-course forum. Students from my Grad 650 section, don’t forget, your final semester analysis papers are due electronically by Monday noon.” Being my termination is effective in 10 minutes, I have no idea who is going to grade all that…

Deep breath. “OK, any questions?”

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by crisbaj

‘The Last Last Lecture’ is copyright ©2018-2020 by crisbaj. All rights reserved. No reproductions, reprinting or reposting without express permission of the author.

Contact:  http://www.crisbaj.com

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